Comb your hair, gel your face, Sydney. That'll make the things your other appendages will be doing this week seem...
We're going to be honest with you, Brisbane. This week you won't win. But there's gin, there's chocolate, and we'll teach you how to get freaky dressed as Steampunk Healthy Harold. Who says being a loser doesn't have its perks? 10) The Australian Academy of Cinemagraphic Makeup...
The exits are located here, here and here, Melbourne. So wave goodbye to your familial and financial death-hole of an existence, because we're talking you on a spontaneous cultural bender round the world. 10) Behind The Lines 18th Aug-15th Sep Ah yes. Politics. Look, you have to face...
Do your laundry, Melbourne. We're taking you to the open seas and to the very fringes of your sanity. So. You'll need clean underwear. 10) Mrs Hopper Turns One 15th September And she's already married? Holy hell, this is indeed a disturbing universe. No wonder she's in need...
Sit down and shut up, Sydney. For we here at oncomau believe talking in a movie theatre justifies the re-introduction of capital punishment. 10) Blackmores Half Marathon 16th September Yes, you read right, you ailing pile of human sausage meat. It's time once again to strap your various limbs...
Shave yourself, Sydney. We're attaching the electrodes to you now. 10) Friday the 14th Revival 14th September You know, we usually like to put our own spin on whatever we serve up to you, but honestly, this event has been so expertly phrased by the devils themselves, it would...
Finally, Brisbane. It's your time to shine. So shower, shave and get a goddamn haircut. It's spring and that gross depression beard doesn't make you look as alternative as you think. No matter upon what part of your body it currently resides. 10) Adopt A Sloth Party 8th...
You are the Nightrider. You are a rocker, you are a roller, you an are out-of-controller! And you seem a little...
Spring's here, Sydney, so shed your skin and pop the top. We'll show you ours if you show us yours. 10) Lemons 19th Birthday Party 7th September Yes, we could make up some half-assed truism about making lemonade, but frankly, lemonade is possibly the worst outcome of one of...
Sing your heart out, Sydney. In the shower, we mean. We've got an arsenal of real singers for you this week and they're far far superior. 10) Australian Geographic Nature Photographer of the Year 24th-31st August I mean...