Top 10 Melbourne Revelry On this week 07/07/2019

Get down on all fours and howl at the moon. Anything to drown out 24 straight hours of Doof music.


10) RnB vs EDM

7th July

What: Another blasting party. A five hour Sunday Night rave featuring the best of RnB, Hip-Hop and TRVP (Trap) versus the best of EDM. Also, there’ll be free pizza.

Why: EDM and pizza so low in quality it’s free. They’re really playing it fast and loose with the gag-reflex here. Which might be a liability thing. The blood alcohol percentage required to appreciate a night like this would be lethal were it not for the ability to vomit spectacularly.


9) The Deadly Sins of SynCity

13th July

What: “The LUSTY girls of MEM will charm you like a snake; The Bandit crew from Babylon leave ENVY in their wake; The PRIDE of Coco Poco is a parrot in a cage; Steal it at your peril to inspire WRATH and rage; Together we are GLUTTONS as we dance through night till day; Music makes us GREEDY as we dance our doubts away; The only SLOTH imagined is the one with no costume; Don your festive finery so colour fills the room.”

Why: From their description we ascertain this is a costumed EDM night. And we could’ve just put that in the description. But they’ve clearly made an effort with their description and we felt we should acknowledge it. After all, it’s rare to discover an EDM night that’s described with more than a series of punctuation marks.


8) Tramp & Candy Present: The 24 Hour Good Doof

12th July

What: They had the Good Doof, and boy did they Doof, so now they present the 24 hour Good Doof. 24 hours of heavy bass and electro vibes.

Why: A genre of music the name of which onomatopoeically mimics a bird flying into a glass window feels like a jokey linguistic coincidence. Until you hear the music.


7) Who Loves? Deep House & Techno: 2nd Birthday Club Night

12th July

What: Celebrate two years of ‘Who Loves?’! For their 2nd birthday, they’ve planned a very special night with their residents and 3 guest artists: Mish’chief, whose track selection is always full of power, energy and emotion, Liam Sieker, whose live sets have the deep and melodic sound that you love and Jimmy Fingers, whose extensive music collection of soulful house always gets everyone moving.

Why: All the power, melody and soul a two year old is capable of expressing. Sounds like the perfect description of a night of EDM.


6) Eat The Beat: Yaya

13th July

What: Bringing his African ethnic roots together with his fine Italian taste, Yaya is surely one of the hottest names in the electro scene, moving constantly between the big meccas of European electronic music. Come experience him live.

Why: A night of what is arguably culture in the form of what is arguably music.


5) Full Moon Party

12th July

What: Billboard The Venue will be completely transformed over 2 rooms, with 1000’s of free glow sticks, festival wands, flashing leis, UV face and body paint, fire performers and amazing neon light shows!

Why: Like a bad LSD trip but completely devoid of any meaningful revelations.


4) Revolver Sundays present Wehbba

7th July

What: Wehbba is considered one of the premiere electronic music producers hailing from Brazil, gracing the industry’s most respected labels and parties across the globe. Fast forward to the next dance at Revolver Upstairs, you’ve got a party ahead of you!

Why: A night involving Brazil without painful revelations of the world’s sociopolitical climate or painful crotch burn. (Though we can’t categorically assure you that you won’t experience one or both.).


3) Skegss 2019 Tour 

13th June

What: Australian surf music and garage rock trio, Skegss, are hitting the road once more in support of their debut ARIA #2 album ‘My Own Mess’ and its new single and video ‘Road Trip.’

Why: Pop-rock so generic you don’t have to know the lyrics to sing along. You just need a straw fedora and infinite ways to revelate that what makes you so hip is that you have no life direction.


2) Berlin Calling with Takaaki Itoh

13th July

What: With regular fixtures at Berlin techno institutions such as Berghain and Tresor, Takaaki’s hypnotic style has become a worldwide staple among DJs and patrons of the fast dark alike. Experience one of Japan’s most respected underground techno DJs around.

Why: Japan and Germany together? Huh. We thought it would take at least three more years for the axis powers to announce their re-establishment.


1) The Whisky Club Birthday Party 

11th July

What: The Whisky Club has teamed up with The GlenDronach to throw party extravaganzas all around Australia! Enjoy a whisky cocktail on arrival, five GlenDronach single malt whiskies, charcuterie and cheese boards, birthday (whisky) cake and lots of general banter and good times!

Why: You might as well celebrate their birthday. With the amount of whisky you’ll be drinking, you’re unlikely to see your next one.

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