Top 10 Melbourne Culture On this week 14/03/2021

Eat, drink and make kidney stones.


10) Hanging by a Thread: The Ways of Women

21st March

What: ‘Hanging by a Thread…’ is a 50 minute prologue performance that culminates at Old Treasury Building’s current exhibition ‘Wayward Women?’ Based on historic research, the play presents a taste of 19th century Melbourne life. Its four characters highlight the restricted lives and choices of many women at that time, focusing on the circumstances surrounding those women who, for varying reasons, lived on the margins of society.

Why: Remember feeling terrible about something other than an ailing environment, right-wing authoritarianism and the pandemic? It’s time you felt that feeling again.


9) Secret Garden Bottomless Drinks

19th March

What: Experience an afternoon of bottomless cocktails in a beautiful secret garden.

Why: Mary Lennox would’ve been a lot less sour had she been a pisshead.


8) Free Movies at Fed Square: Goonies

14th March

What: The Big Screen at Fed Square is lighting up this summer with a stack of classic films, and they’re all completely free. This iteration will feature Goonies.

Why: Brace yourself; the twenty-something-year-olds and their faux nostalgia are coming.


7) Imaginaria

14th March onwards

What: Are you ready to step into the future? Imaginaria at The District Docklands brings you a celebration of imagination, technology and play. Fully interactive bespoke sounds, scents and lights activate in response to your movement as you walk, slide and glide through the dreamlike landscapes. Walk into a giant inflatable bubble, navigate a futuristic light maze or jump into a cosmic abyss. Check your shoes in at the departure lounge and prepare to venture into another dimension.

Why: If you can imagine something more olfactorily powerful than athlete’s foot it will help.


6) NGV Triennial

16th March

What: The NGV Triennial occurs every three years and presents globally significant projects which demonstrate the extraordinary intersection between contemporary art, design and architecture. It offers a visually arresting and thought-provoking view of the world and this version features 86 projects by over 100 artists and designers from more than 30 countries.

Why: Because the images we’ve been consistently fed over the last year just haven’t been visually arresting enough.


5) Melbourne Celtic Festival 

17th March

What: Unique Spaces in the historic Mission to Seafarers complex will burst to life with Celtic Rock and Traditional music, Scottish smallpipes, Celtic harp, jigs, reels, beautiful singing and great craic. Melbourne Celtic Festival is a family friendly event and all ticket proceeds (every cent) will be directed to Community Mental Health programs.

Why: The one time a year when people without Irish ancestry can celebrate Irish culture without immediately indicating to everyone that they’re one half-step away from shouting “white power”!


4) Tamil Rogeon: Son of Nyx

19th March

What: Jazz violist and orchestral composer, Tamil Rogeon, returns with his soaring and celestial jazz odyssey Son of Nyx. His first full-length album in three years, is one of the very few viola-led jazz LPs of our time. Named Son of Nyx after the Greek God of satire, Momus, (who is the twin of Oizys and son of Nyx, Goddess of the night), the album is a swirling six-track prism of exploratory modal jazz, Afro-latin percussion and boundless string-led composition, featuring Melbourne’s best.

Why: Just when you thought jazz couldn’t sound any more like it didn’t know where the hell it was going.


3) Free Movies at Fed Square: Little Shop of Horrors

20th March

What: The Big Screen at Fed Square is lighting up this summer with a stack of classic films, and they’re all completely free. This iteration will feature Little Shop of Horrors.

Why: Sure, it involves an insidious plague taking over the entire world and plunging it into chaos, but it also involves a sadistic Steve Martin who sings and a sexually masochistic Bill Murray.


2) Melbourne Fashion Festival

14th-20th March

What: The Melbourne Fashion Festival is an annual celebration of fashion, arts, ideas and creative endeavour for everyone to enjoy. The Festival presents world-class runways featuring Australia’s established and emerging designers, shopping events and experiences, styling and beauty workshops, industry seminars, networking events, exhibitions, tours, live entertainment and much more.

Why: Turns out there’s something even more stupid, rich and frivolous to distract yourself with than the royal f***ing family.


1) Melbourne Food & Wine Festival 

14th-31st March

What: The Melbourne Food & Wine Festival is back – bringing you some of the longest-running festival favourites and a handful of new events, plus events in restaurants and bars all over town. Close to 50 events are happening in restaurants and other venues all around Melbourne, with tickets to suit all budgets. Choose from pasta-making workshops, riesling and Thai dinners, one-off chef collaborations and more, as you get out there and support local hospitality businesses.

Why: You’ve been edging closer and closer to that heart attack with your COVID melted cheese on gin-soaked coco-pops diet. Well, restrictions are over. It’s time you classed-up your coronary.

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