Decide Where Your Loyalties Lie at the Melbourne Russian Festival

These are exciting times aren’t they?

The world is trembling on the precipice of multiple cataclysmic events, the tension in the air is so thick you could cut it with a knife, of course that could be the lung-crushing smoke particulates finally forming a solid mass that will kill us all, but the point is, we are nearing the shattering climax of this epoch’s third act.

After a cold, unforgiving beginning based on mutual hatred, fear and clashing personalities, the tense era of will they, won’t they, the US and Russia have finally thrown caution to the blast winds and started f**king each others brains right out of their skulls.

And you know what that means. It’s time to pick a side.

Because, like we said, the third act climax is coming, but we’ve two more acts to face after that and we don’t want to end up with the loser. If our life experience has taught us anything, it’s that the one in the relationship holding the whip and the gimp leash is the horse to bet on.

Enter: The Melbourne Russian Festival.

Only for one day, one of the most iconic places of Melbourne, the Royal Exhibition Building, will be turned into a traditional Russian village for a sensational day of delicious food, stunning performances, and unique masterclasses.

The festival will showcase traditional Russian culture in a lively, exciting atmosphere. It will include Russian dancing, music and entertainment, food stalls with authentic cuisine and a beer garden, beautiful arts and crafts, colourful Russian decorations and costumes, interactive activities and games, a children’s village with fun activities for the whole family, and unique masterclasses, featuring some of the well-known traditional folk crafts, many of which are centuries old and cannot be found elsewhere.

Our national denouement may be an endless night of borscht with a Russian sadist, but at least there’ll be beer and folk crafts and Jerry Springer won’t be there.

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