Unicorns: A Pink Salvation
Been alienated by everyone in your life for an inherent lack of feeling?
Don’t worry. We have the solution.
A night so excessively, violently pink your eyeballs will be watering long into the next week.
And you know we’re not exaggerating on the violence of pink. We’ve been inside both Priceline and our mothers’ uteri.
Here’s your solution.
Also, it involves horses with horns. An animal perfectly capable of crushing your ribs with one of its four feet…but with an extra weapon on its face.
Why wouldn’t these logically hellish creatures be perceived as magical?
A night of burlesque that will stimulate you for the moment, distract you for the time being, and ultimately physically produce enough salt water from your burning retinas to construct believable emotional capacity for the next week.
Looks like your uncle was ‘late’ at just the right time.