Top 10 things On in Brisbane this week 16/12/2018

Time to look upon your sins, Brisbane. They’re grossly insufficient. We’ll help you with that.


10) Self Awareness Fair

16th December

What: Go ahead and treat yourself to a sacred time out at the Unique High Vibe Centre during their open day. The centre will be jam packed with psychic readers, tarot and oracle readers, mediums, spiritual stall holders, massage therapy, sound healing, energy healers, frequency healers, crystals, special gifts, intuitive art, high vibes and more!

Why: Or you could just stay at home and bash your head repeatedly with a bat. It’s about the same intellectual experience.


9) indepenDANCE

19th December

What: indepenDANCE encourages local independent artists to come together, create, explore, share, shatter and collaborate on new work to create immersive live art and dance performances. Come and experience the fruits of their labour. 5 new works. 5 choreographers. 16 dancers. 1 showing.

Why: And about 25 ways to strap (that we’ve discovered so far), tape or stick a flask of whisky on (or in) your person to enable you to be able to enjoy contemporary dance.


8) Free Christmas Picnic

18th December

What: An amazing free sausage sizzle for members of the disabled and non-disabled community in Cleveland. Pop along and get a sausage and some nibbles – there will be great prizes and giveaways on the day. Along with candy canes for the kids and games.

Why: Your dose of morality for the week, Brisbane. And here’s the best bit. It’s the illusion of morality. Come along to this event – held by a group that works hard to support the differently abled in the Cleveland community – stuff your face and, if you can’t be screwed to go shopping this week, your pants with free food and appear, for all intents and purposes, to be a good person.


7) Jerome Williams

21st December

What: Jerome describes his music as “melodic, percussive, funky-rock based roots”, or as he likes to call it ‘roots fusion’. He has meshed together guitar techniques and styles from across the musical landscape coupled with soulful, rap vocals that he seamlessly fuses elements of classic roots with contemporary and progressive genres. Come see him doing his thing at Eddie’s Grub House.

Why: Because if there’s one thing we’ve learned so far in life it’s that the more words there are in something’s description, the better it is. Like how deep fried spicy chicken sausage cheese sticks are clearly far superior to chicken confit.


6) Melt featuring Dousk

16th December

What: Take a Melty journey through the sands of time with Greek progressive legend Dousk at Capulet bar.

Why: Look, we’ll be the first to admit we don’t know much about the progressive music scene. But having just listened to a few of Dousk’s tracks, we have to say, it’s the trendiest elevator music we’ve ever heard. Brisbane Skytower should really snap up this guy before someone else does.


5) Christmas Special K-pop, RnB and EDM Night

21st December

What: The biggest K-pop night party in Brisbane is back! Rock out to the best K-pop, RnB and EDM in this Christmas special!

Why: There’s nothing like the requisite drugs at an EDM night to help you forget the deadly physical harassment, rampant abuse of plastic surgery, fan letters in human bodily fluids and diabetes-inducing saccharine that is the K-pop world.


4) X-Mas Bollywood Bash

22nd December

What: Hear Hear! Christmas is near. Bollywood Club presents “Christmas Eve” where you can laugh, drink and dance your heart out. Dance all night to the Bollywood beats with resident DJ’s to entertain you and make sure you enjoy the eve to the fullest.

Why: Enjoy it all you want. Just brace yourself for the depressing realisation that you’ll never ever enjoy be able to yourself on the same level as the three drunk white chicks in the middle of the dance-floor screaming ‘Namaste bitches!’.


3) Henschke from the Cellar Long Lunch

20th December

What: Drum Dining has just picked up a brilliant cellar full of Henschke reds and they’re desperate to crack them open and share. Enjoy a cracking range of Henschke Keyneton going back to the outstanding 1990 vintage (with a few gastronomic surprises thrown in).

Why: Or skip the inevitable expense of a pretentious gourmet wine and food night and buy two bottles of wine from Aldi, slap on a monocle and top hat and experience a far more enjoyable, if admittedly off-brand, dose of pretension.


2) Drag Brunch Christmas Edition ft Karen From Finance

16th December

What: ConDRAGulations, you’re invited to Brisbane’s Drag Brunch Club Christmas Edition featuring a highly interactive show fuelled by amazing hosts, a delicious brunch menu & bar. Experience a hilarious fun time with your hosts Sellma Soul & BeBe Gunn and special guest Karen From Finance, Australia’s premiere ‘corporate’ Queen.

Why: What better time to experience the horror of audience participation based performance than when you’re trying to figure out how to elegantly cram an entire wheel of brie in your face?


1) Summer Solstice: A Mid Summer Night Festival

22nd December

What: Celebrate the Summer Solstice – the longest day of the year – with a mid summer night festival for the whole family. Featuring fire twirlers, night markets, food trucks, ethical gifts, musicians and DJs and kids activities.

Why: Or, just stay inside where there’s far less potential heatstroke, children or accidentally bumping into a guy in a full body leotard.

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