Top 10 Melbourne Revelry On this week 14/10/2018
Watch closely, Melbourne. If you blink you’ll miss the trick.
10) Drink for Pink
A fundraiser for breast cancer research with desserts, canapés, a photo booth, drinks and silent auctions. Donating to an overfunded organisation that fiddles their finances in order to boost your moral ego has never been so easy.
9) Bears ‘n’ Brews
What a wonderful world it would be if this event was about getting drunk and fighting a bear. But no, it’s a bunch of sad, pathetic humans experiencing a degustation of different tropical beers and telling themselves they definitely have the capacity to fight a bear.
8) Cherry Day Party
“Cherry day finally pops its day party virginity”. That’s their descriptor. And frankly we’re confused as to why. Virgins are never good at it the first time, yet they’re somehow lauded as something of inherent value…oh. Now we get it. There’s house music involved.
Come, join us in the basement. When have the events following that request ever gone awry? An event for lovers of hard-style and light shows. This description just isn’t getting any less threatening is it?
6) Eat The Beat presents: Supernova
Sounds…unpleasant for the gastrointestinal tract. They could have gone with something a little easier to digest. An act that comprises live instruments, decks and ableton will take you on a musical journey to Italy. And not the kind with charming old men playing lutes.
5) House X Empire
The ultimate lesbian party. Would be bloody great in politics right now. But in the mean time, House X Empire is throwing a shindig at Brown Alley for what they term is “the ultimate girls night out”.
4) ABYSS x GROUNDFLOOR pres. Gabriel Moraes
Well, we are in the abyss. We might as well blind ourselves to the echoing emptiness with a loud multidimensional techno event comprising performances, visuals, market stalls and interactive spaces. Oh yes, and a Brazilian man will be there.
3) Unicorns – A Pink Paradise
Baste yourself in pink goo and enter into a night of burlesque partying so drenched in the colour pink, it’ll seem like one of those dreams when your mother has violently shoved you back up into her uterus.
2) Illuminate Gallery Grand Opening
The grand boozy opening of Melbourne’s newest photographic studio and gallery. So if you’re shy you better where a balaclava…but…wait no. That…might be badly received. Ignore that advice.
1) Cheap Trick Tour
Surrender to the dream police. They want you to want them.