Top 10 Melbourne Revelry On this week 10/03/2019

This week’s so hot it’s turned an indie singer into a piece of dried fruit.


10) TR!P feat. Scott Alert & St. Luke

16th March

What: A night of the best old school DJs that will play nothing but 100% vinyl. Get ready for SCOTT ALERT, ST. LUKE, DARK SIN, MISS MEL, EXA-CIST & LUCKEE PHIL playing all your favourite Trance, Hard Trance & Hardstyle bangers!

Why: We’re not that well affiliated with trance, hard trance or hardstyle, but we will admit, after listening to a small sample, that it is genuinely impressive that such offensive noises could be produced by a vinyl record. How far we’ve come as a species.!P-feat.-Scott-Alert-and-St.-Luke/4a003ce0-422a-11e9-b14f-a713526e5192


9) Cloud Nine Day Party

16th March

What: A brilliant day party to welcome the Autumn! Featuring the talents of Morning Maxwell, Short Round, Duane Bartolo, Alavate and many more!

Why: Trading sun-induced skin cancer for the cancer upon society that is generic club music. A cheaper, more inclusive fix.


8) Clowns

16th March

What: This band took their ethos of inspiration from 80’s punk staples like Black Flag, Minor Threat and applied it to the fabric of the Australian contemporary music climate. Experience them live.

Why: Counterculture in 2019. So replace pissing on stage and screaming ‘fuck the government’ with veganism and refusing to donkey vote because your vote actually counts.


7) Tramp presents Labour Day Eve

10th March

What: Labour Day! The day where we celebrate that our fine government introduced the 8 hour work day. And what better way to celebrate than an OLD SCHOOL holiday slay at casa del Tramp!

Why: We can’t help but feel there’s something troubling about a summer-adjacent ‘holiday slay’. But then again…careful phrasing isn’t really the focus of swapping work for getting tanked.


6) Garden of Beats

15th March

What: A listening event where you can get jiggy to a range of Melbourne’s home grown producers. Learn about your city’s music culture and vibes. ‘The Listening’ will be the first platform allowing a number of Melbourne finest producers to showcase their music, beats and vibes.

Why: Finally. A music event that honours the DJ producers. We always thought that every night at nearly every club wasn’t nearly sufficient.


5) C.W. Stoneking

15th March

What: For C.W. Stoneking the road continues to call and, following successful solo dates across the USA & through Europe earlier this year, C.W is returning to local stages in March for a limited series of solo performances. Experience him live.

Why: Cab Calloway in the era of Instagram. We…don’t really know how this one’s going to work out.


4) Melbourne Holi Festival 

10th March

What: Welcome to “The Australian Indian Innovations Incorporated” Melbourne Holi Festival (Festival of Colours)! The traditional festival features people chasing each other in the streets, fields, temples and buildings, armed with packets of dry coloured powder and splattering random people from head to toe in colours. It’s a free-for-all. It’s madness. And it’s really freaking fun! This version will feature scrumptious food by Melbourne’s various most famous food trucks, a massive DJ lineup , nonstop music and the fun of playing with powdered colour and water balloons!

Why: Finally. A night of cultural appropriation that leaves a more entertaining mark than the club that stamped your hand on their ‘Bollywood Fever’ night.


3) Tash Sultana Flowstate World Tour

14th March

What: Tash started out playing open mic nights on a fake id and busking on the streets of Melbourne. Now Tash is selling out every headline show, from theatres to arenas across multiple countries and playing dozens of high profile festivals around the globe.

Why: Imagine every generic indie pop-rock singer combined and shove a beanie on its head in 30 degree Australian weather.


2) Melbourne Food and Wine Festival 

9th-24th March

What: Food and wine lovers in their hundreds and thousands each year indulge in bespoke events that fill Melbourne’s labyrinthine network of restaurants, laneways, lights-turned-down basements, dizzying rooftops as well as spilling into spectacular regional Victoria. The Melbourne Food and Wine Festival is all about supporting and cultivating the very things that make Melbourne – and the surrounding regions – a gastronomic playground.

Why: Eat, drink and make merry. Consume laxatives, vomit whisky and regret your lifestyle choices. Repeat.


1) Download Festival 

11th March

What: Australia’s monster metal music festival featuring the likes of Ozzy Osbourne, two of the Big Four, with Slayer (on their final world tour) and Anthrax, Judas Priest, Alice in Chains, Ghost and loads more.

Why: It seems all the music legends are returning from the dead. But it’s not so jarring when they already spent their heyday simulating corpses. Just try to ignore the smell of real rotting flesh.

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