Melbourne Revellers Top 10 Weekly 27/05/18

This hedonistic lifestyle of over-consumption is going to kill us all. And this week’s the week! Dance to your grave and die laughing with oncomau’s litany of temptations.


10) Apparatus for Transtemporal Occurrence of Impending Space

From 25th May

Youth is no longer immune to a sense of impending doom; it has never been immune to the idea of a free date. Tip your top hats and adjust your lover’s monocle before this Steampunk monument to early 20th Century science fiction. Crank the handle that activates an automata theatre hidden within the porthole and envision the envisioning of a future bereft of about 80% of the misery we now call sanity.


9) The Weekly With Charlie Pickering

30th May-12 Sep

Experience Australia’s almost-equivalent to John Oliver in his true form – that is – slightly taller than 15cm. Join the studio audience and actually earn that sense of knowledge-based superiority you feel over your elders in real time.


8) Casablanca Latin Nights

From 25th May

Fast forward a few dates and get as handsy as you like. It’s just how Latin dance works, baby. With Casablanca nights, feel all the fiery passion of the Latin underground without the sobering civil unrest. It’s a hell of a fun co-opt.


7) Dumplings ‘N’ Massage

29th May-26th June

It’s finally happening. It’s exactly what it sounds like. You will eat dumplings. You will be massaged. What a time to be alive.‘N’-Massage/763d66c0-5f09-11e8-93ea-bfdb9889e3bf


6. Espresso Sunday

27th May

Experience true balance of your social lubricants and/or worryingly powerful addictions; every Sunday afternoon The Park will host Espresso Martini Sundays, introducing 10 different flavours from classic blends to more exotic fare.


5) Burlesque Magnifique

26th May-28th July

Get in fast for the most indulgent slow-burn you’ll ever experience. Deep in the vault of a Gold-Rush era bank, amidst Edwardian armchairs and silent concierges, trade in the hunchback and hardback for the highbacks and barebacks and drink in a sensuous melange of the most alluring burlesque, boylesque, strip and tease acts in the country.


4) Comedy at Spleen

From 28th May

Monday nights, the Spleen Bar plays host to the best comedy in the city. See the newest comedic talents and at least one unnamed big name. The funniest and cheapest crapshoot you’ll ever take.


3) National Burger Day

27th May

Kick off the first day of the new week by salving the alcoholic repercussions of the last day of the last week. Don the muumuu unashamedly and wade mouth-first through a sea of greasy pleasure.


2)  Filth Comedy

27th May-29th July

This isn’t your mother’s comedy night. It’s your uncle’s. The one who lives in Prague and has been cut out of the will. Presented by a grand dame of the underground Melbourne comedy scene, this event is not for the tight-of-sphincter.


1) Melbourne International Jazz Festival

1st June-10th June

The cool cats have taken over the city. Respite from the cold, wintry cacophony of everyday life can be found nightly in the warm, boozy cacophony of jazz.

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