Bow Out with Glass Animals

Optimism is a difficult pitch. Especially if you’re not currently part of the youth, for whom optimism is a contrarian state.

In the 80s and 90s it was universally accepted that simply being cynical constituted an identity, and so we all went hard in on it, because developing an actual personality is time-consuming, intimidating and virtually impossible until you reach the age at which the zeitgeist no longer has any use for you.

The youth these days are rebelling against their “hope is poison” parents and appear to be fighting back with chickpeas, voting, a variety of constantly changing facial expressions and things that eschew moodiness in favour of sparkles. Things like Glass Animals, who will be putting on a show.

Yes, English psychedelic pop band Glass Animals will reimagine their live show as a broadcast dubbed “Live In The Internet.” The show will feature a full band performance, special guests and creative fan interaction — all in a striking virtual space.

We’re not saying this one’s only for the youth. Self-improvement doesn’t stop at the age of 18. You could still try to eat the chickpeas, show your teeth some more, shove the glitter glue gun of aughts psych pop deep in your ear and pull the trigger.

Or you could accept the fact that you’ll never be relevant again and do what you’ve always done; hunch your shoulders, cast your eyes downwards, blast some 90s grunge dreck and spend the rest of your life despising everyone not within two years of your current age.

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